An Unusual Cure
by Rointheta
Summary: The Doctor has a cold and misses Jackie's pie night. Rose brings home several slices for him to cheer him up, but the pie has quite a different effect than what she expected.


_This is the twenty first fic in my 2013 Advent Calendar!  
_

**Note**: slightly cracky ;)

**Prompt**: "'how about TenToo/Rose and the use of pumpkin pie in bed?"  
**Prompter**: bitchymama  
**beta**: resile

* * *

**AN UNUSUAL CURE**

* * *

Rose maneuvered the stack of styrofoam cartons from one arm to the other to unlock the door and get inside the dark flat. She let her purse slid from her shoulder and drop on the floor, tossed her keys inside, and kicked off her heels. She flicked the lamp switch and, peering around the stack, avoided tripping over the Doctor's many chucks strewn over the hall on her way to the bedroom.

"Doctor?" she said, in her softest voice, when she pushed the door open with her hip. "Are you awake?"

"Yeah. Everything hurts," he said, and she could practically hear the pout. "Can't sleep like this."

"Oh, my poor Doctor. D'you have enough energy to turn on the lights, 'cause I brought pie for you."

The lamp above his side of the bed turned on, showing her a red-nosed, bleary eyed, but beaming, Doctor sitting up in bed. "You did?"

"Yeah." She put the cartons on her nightstand and crawled into bed with him, pulling him closer to let his head rest on her chest as she ran her fingers through his hair. "Mum let me take the leftovers home to you, since you were looking forward to pie night so much."

"Can't believe I got sick. I'm the unluckiest man in the world. No. In the universe. Maybe even the multiverse."

"But I brought pie! Ten slices."

"Ten?!"

"Yeah. And all of them are different flavours as well."

"Really?" He perked up and gave her a sloppy kiss on the cheek. "You, Rose Tyler, are a goddess."

"So I've heard." She grinned. "Usually not in this context, though…"

"I am, unfortunately, not in a state where I can enjoy your divine talents in that other context," he said, burrowing his face back in her chest with a content hum, "but I'll gladly have a slice of pie!"  
"Yeah? I wasn't sure. When I have a cold I lose my appetite completely. Everything tastes like paper."

"Well, you're human. A very lovely human. My favourite human." He pressed his lips to her breastbone. "But I'm still mostly Gallifreyan and definitely superior. I can still taste and smell rather well. And when I'm sick, my body needs fuel. Especially fuel in the form of pie."

She chuckled. "Okay. So I got you, uhm, blueberry, salted caramel pecan, strawberry rhubarb, custard tart, pumpkin, spiced apple, chocolate bourbon walnut, frozen chocolate and peanut butter, peach, and...uhm, raspberry custard."

"No banana?"

"I'm sorry, Doctor. There was no banana pie."

"Oh."

She rubbed his arm and kissed the top of his head. "What would you like instead?"

"Hm… I've never had pumpkin in this body. Don't know what it tastes like with this tongue."

"Okay! Pumpkin it is," she said, running her fingers along the stack until she found the carton marked 'pumpkin'. She flipped it open and handed it to the Doctor. "Want me to get you a fork? Or some whipped cream? Ice cream, maybe?"

"I could do with a cuppa. Peppermint?"

"Of course. I'll be right back."

* * *

.

* * *

Rose had just poured hot water into the cup when she heard a crash coming from the bedroom. Adrenalin shot through her, and she dropped the pot and sprinted through the flat to the bedroom, heart racing in her chest. The Doctor lay in bed, clutching his chest, face and throat red and swollen.

"Oh, my god. What–"

"Torchwood. Ambulance. Anaphy-anaphy–"

She pulled her mobile out of her pocket and rang Torchwood, stammering out something about allergic reaction and needing help right away before hanging up, stepping over the broken alarm clock the Doctor must've thrown at the door to get her attention, and climbing back in bed.

"What can I do? How can I help?"

"I… Nothing. We don't have–" He wheezed out a breath, staring up at her with glossy eyes. "Rose Tyler, I–"

"No! Doctor? Doctor!" She unbuttoned his pyjama shirt with trembling fingers and pressed her ear against his bare chest. Nothing. Tears welled up in her eyes and she clutched his arms, shouting at him, "No! You can't die, you bloody bastard! We're supposed to grow old together."

She started pushing down at the center of his chest with her hands, hard and fast, before tilting his head back by his chin, pinching his nose and breathing into him. After two breaths, she began pushing again, but her movements soon changed from frantic to mechanical when she realised her efforts didn't have an effect.

She barely heard the doorbell once it rang but, as soon as it registered in her grief-muddled mind, she darted from the bed. The floor flew under her feet and she flung up the door, staring at Jake and a doctor she knew by face, but not by name, through her tears.

"Where is he?"

"Bedroom. But it's…" She shook her head, but let them in and ran after them when they moved towards the bedroom. "You were fast."

"We teleported," Jake said, "You sounded–"

"Oh, hello!" A man dressed in the Doctor's too-small jimjams, and with a headful of red, frizzy hair, stepped out of the bedroom, grinning from ear to ear. "Jake, doctor Saunders. Lovely to see you this evening."

"Uhm…" Rose took a step closer, poking him in his bare chest. He rocked back on his heels, then forward, meeting her eye without wavering. "Did you just regenerate?"

"Yeah…" He rubbed his forehead. "You know, Gallifreyans are born with one heart. We get two after the first regeneration. Guess I should've thought of that, yeah?"

"You have two hearts?" She pressed both palms against his chest, feeling the familiar double beats. "Oh, my god."

"But, Rose, look. Look!" He pointed at his head. "I'm ginger! I'm finally ginger! Got freckles, too, don't I? Look at this." He shrugged off his pyjama shirt and twirled on the spot, showing off his pale, freckled body. "D'you think it was because I ate pumpkin pie?"

"Oh, my god!"

He flashed off a toothy grin. "Guess you could say that pie was to die for."

She slapped him hard on the arm. "Oh, my god!"

"No? Too soon?"

She growled at him. "I'm gonna kill you!"

"Yeah, come at me, Rose." He moved backwards, taunting her by waving his hands at her. "Got a few spare lives, you know. Do your worst, love."

She hurled herself at him, looping her arms around a thicker neck, wrapping her legs around wider hips, moving her mouth over fuller lips. He grabbed her arse and held her in place as he backed into the bedroom.

"Uhm, we'll just leave, then, yeah?" Jake called after them. "Seems like you two got everything under control. Uhm… Glad that you're...alive? Oh, whatever. Let's go, Saunders."

The Doctor and Rose fell into bed together, noses bumping and teeth clashing as they learned how his new body kissed. They tugged at their clothing, tossing away each garment they removed, until they lay entwined and naked.

She pulled back and brushed his ginger curls out of his eyes. "What about your cold? Are you really feeling up to this?"

"I'm definitely up for this," he said, grinding his hips against her. "Don't have a cold anymore. It went away with the regeneration."

"What about regeneration coma?"

"Nah. That's an exception, not a rule. And this regeneration was smooth as a Polkorvish scurvy-bottom."

"A what?"

"Guess you could call it a dolphin."

"Doctor, don't talk about dolphins in bed. Or scurvy," she said, moving down his body. A surprised noise escaped her when she caught sight of his crotch. "You look exactly the same."

"Do I? Yes!" He punched the air and propped himself up on his elbows, looking down at her. "I was very pleased with my previous penis, you know. And you were, too! So when I felt the tingle of regeneration washing through my body, all I could think was 'Rose loves my penis. Let my penis stay the same. Rose loves my penis. Let my penis–'"

He let out a strangled sound and dropped down on his back, one hand nestling in her hair.

She released him with a pop and licked her lips. "Seems like I still can shut you up the same way. Good to know," she said, bobbing her head back down and letting him enjoy her divine talents.

* * *

**the end**


End file.
